The Woman and Her Husband

The Woman and Her Husband


A woman once came to see The Buddha to complain about her marriage and her husband.

After the woman had poured out all her grievances, The Buddha asked the woman, "From what you've described to me, it seems to me that you are saying your marriage and your husband is imperfect."

"Yes!" said the woman, "That's what I've been trying to tell you."

"Just out of curiosity, do you make mistakes sometimes?" asked The Great Teacher.

"Why yes, of course!" replied the woman, "I'm only human, you know."

Nodding his head in understanding, The Buddha asked again, "Do you get angry sometimes?"

"Definitely!"

"And when you are angry, do you scold your husband and children unreasonably, out of anger?" asked The Great Master gently.

"Yes, I did," admitted the woman, apologetically.

"Hmm ......... considering that you did all of the above, it seems that you're not perfect, too, eh?" said The Buddha.

Embarrassed, the woman smiled sheepishly at The Buddha as He continued,

"So, if you're not perfect, and your husband is also imperfect, how then can you expect a perfect marriage?!"




"2 wrongs don't make a right."




"Easily seen are other's faults;

Hard to see are our own."

- The Buddha

"People can do us wrong; but we must always do right."

"The more evil that comes to me,

The more good will radiate from me."

- The Buddha

"Avoid making other people's problem our problem."

"Who's right? Who's wrong?

As long as you argue, You're wrong."




"Which is more important - The harmony of a relationship, or being right?"




"Agreeing that someone is right does not mean you are wrong."



"To be free is to let go;

To let go is to forgive;

To forgive is to love;

To love is to accept;

To accept is to know it does NOT matter."

(* Really, a lot of things in life REAL-ly does not matter )

"No one is right, because arguing is always wrong.

Just like 2 boxers slugging it out in the ring,

Both the winner and the loser always come away battered and bruised."

- Ajahn Maha Boowa Nanasampanno

"Avoid risking your happiness just to win some small point."

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"Ingredients to a good / successful partnership :

Communication, Co-operation, Compromise, Support."

Man and Suffering

Man and Suffering


One day, a man came to see The Buddha and complained that he's angry with a friend, and asked The Buddha what he should do.

The Buddha asked the man, "You angry with your friend?"

"Yes!" said the man, his face flushed red with anger.

"How does it feel being angry with someone?" asked The Buddha again.

"Oh it hurts ........ very deeply inside," said the man, putting his palm on his chest. "It's so painful, it's suffering!"


"Suffering, you say? Hmm ........ that reminds me. Do you remember what I said as The First Noble Truth?" The Buddha continued.

"Yes! There is suffering," answered the man, not understanding where this is leading and how it can help him.

"Ah ......." said The Enlightened One smiling. "So why are you suffering?"

"Because I want my friend to listen to me and do as I say but he's not! It's so infuriating!" said the man, still upset and getting very impatient.


"Do you also remember The Second Noble Truth which I taught?" asked The Buddha kindly and patiently.

"The cause of suffering," came the exasperated reply. ("Why is The Great Teacher asking me all these?! It has got no relevance," thought the man.)

"And what is the cause of suffering ........ ?"

"Craving." ("Oh ........" thought the man.)

"Good!" said The Buddha. "And what did I say as The Third Truth?"

"There's a way out of suffering," said the man, his face breaking into a smile. He's finally on with The Buddha now.

"And what is the way?"

"Contentment, Acceptance, Letting Go, Stop," replied the man with a sigh.

Suddenly, everything seems so clear to him now.

"Good!" said The Buddha. "Now that you have this view / understanding, what is The 4th Noble Truth?"

"The way to end suffering is through The Noble Eightfold Path : Right View / Understanding, Right Thoughts, Speech, Actions ........."

"So now you know what you should do?" asked The Buddha one last time.

"Yes!" said the man, amazed and in awe at the brilliance of The Great Master's Teachings, and he left the place happy, satisfied and very content.

The man understand The Four Noble Truths and knows what he should do.

Do you?

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"You think you know.

You assume you know.

But, do you?".

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"People may know, but how many understand?

Of the few who understood, how many see?

Of the few who saw, how many realise?

Of the few who realised, how many will be Awaken?"
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"Rely on The Dhamma, not on the people;

Rely on Wisdom, not accumulation of knowledge.

Rely on The Meaning of the words, not the words.

Rely on The Complete meaning, not the partial meaning."

- The Buddha
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"Knowledge is Not realisation :

You can have all the knowledge

But if you do not practise,

You're just like a spoon - Not tasting the flavour of soup."

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"If one doesn't understand through practice, one wouldn't understand Buddhism.

Even if one learns (and memorise) the whole Tipitaka (the voluminous recorded teachings of The Buddha), one still will not know."

- Ajahn Chah

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"Though much he recites the Sacred Texts, but acts not accordingly,

That heedless man is like a cowherd who counts others' kine.

He has no share in the fruits of the Holy Life."

- The Buddha, Dhammapada verse 19
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"If the Dhamma isn't brought into the heart, it's not truly known.

It's not actually seen."

- Ajahn Chah
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"Reality is not the same as the theory we study."

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"If a warrior enters battle and fights according to what he's read, he will be no match for his opponent.

He has to battle in a style that goes beyond theory."

- Ajahn Chah
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"The defilements don't lie in the body.

They lie in the heart (mind)."

- Venerable Ajahn Mun

The Meaning of Yoga

The Meaning of Yoga

To most people, Yoga means the physical poses (asanas).

I remembered once when I was still teaching at a club. Before the class began, the participants and I were talking about the subject on yoga.

A Caucasian lady commented, "But that's what yoga is. Physical. All yoga is physical."

I smiled and told her 'no'.

To a certain extend, it is physical.

But that's just scraping the surface.

In Absolute sense, yoga is more than physical.

To put simply, yoga means join or union.

That's why in class, especially when there are beginners, I always say, "Yoga - the union of the mind and the body through the breath."

What this means is uniting the body and the mind as One using the breath.

In other words, fusion.

Two-in-one.

Just as in 2-in-1 coffee mix (coffee + cream together),

or 2-in-1 shampoo (shampoo join with conditioner).

It's when you become the pose and the pose become you.

In Buddhism, yoga means Meditation, which is very true.

There's a meditation technique which the Buddha taught, and used, to gain Enlightenment :

Anapanasati - using the breath as the meditation object to still the mind so that the mind stays with the body at the present moment.

What this means is 2 (Mind and Body) become 1 (Union of Mind-and-Body).

When the mind stays with the body, you'll be mindful every moment,

Whether you stand, walk, sit or lie down, the mind is with the body in every movement,

In the present,

Merging into,

Together with,

The body.

That's why I always feel The Buddha is one really smart being who truly understands the meaning of yoga.

And that's also the reason why I honour and respect this Great Teacher so much, and have absolute faith in His Teachings.

For truly He is the Devamanussanam ... ie. The Teacher of (ALL) gods and men.

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"It is not by or through the use of force do your body get into a pose;

Rather, it's by letting go, do your body then get into the pose."





"Every movement of yoga is a moment of Consciousness.

Every movement of yoga is a moment of Awareness.

Every movement of yoga is a moment of Mindfulness.

And, Every movement of yoga is a moment of Quiet Reflection and Observation.

In short, Meditation."





"Go into the pose, but do not do the pose;

Go into meditation, but do not 'do' meditation.

Stop ALL doing.

Doing = control = force = tight

Be soft, Be gentle, Be Light."





"Rely on the Dhamma, not on people;

Rely on Wisdom, not accumulation of knowledge.

Rely on the meaning of the words, not the words.

Rely on the complete meaning, not the partial meaning."

- The Buddha

"Dhamma can't be taught;

It has to be 'seen' and experienced by oneself - in one's heart."

"No matter how much of the Dhamma you've studied,

It will serve no purpose other than simply being an obstacle to your Meditation."

- Venerable Ajahn Mun




"The defilements don't lie in the body;

They lie in the heart (mind)."

- Venerable Ajahn Mun

Are They Mine?

Are They Mine?



1) I teach Yoga.

And as all of you would probably know by now, that I've been dropping classes.

Conventionally, I call the regular participants, my students.

In Truth / Reality, they're Not Mine.

Cos' they go for other classes, too.

And when I leave, other instructors would come along, or they would go to other instructors.

So how can I say they're 'Mine'?


2) My family : When they die, if they're reborn in the human realm, they'll be somebody else's child, sibling. And when they grow up, somebody else's parents / relatives etc.

So how can I say they're 'Mine'?


3) My so-called possessions : clothes, money etc.

When I die, they'll go to my family, or hopefully, donated away.

So how can I say they're 'Mine'? They'll belong to my family, or whichever charity, temple etc.



4) This body / form : When I die, it'll be disintegrated to the 4 elements : Earth, Wind, Fire and Water.

At the base level : atoms, molecules, protons, neutrons, electrons, cations, anions.

So how can I say it's 'Mine'?

Therefore, "Not Me, Not Mine, Not I, Not Self ( Non-Self ). Anatta!"






"Nothing

Exist Nowhere

Just a light in the dark."




"Ignorance is in the attaching / holding.

No ignorance (Wisdom) is in the letting go."






"Dhamma is for the reclusive;

Not for the entangled."

- The Buddha







"When nothing is mine, how can anyone take anything away from me?"

- The Buddha







"When there's nothing to own, there's no having or losing.

And when that's the case, where will there be any suffering?"

- Ajahn Lee Dhammadharo







"From endearment, affection and attachment springs grief,

From endearment, affection and attachment springs fear;

For him who is wholly free from endearment, affection and attachment,

There is no grief, much less fear."

- The Buddha, Dhammapada verse 212-214

Anger

Anger


"Anger never ceases with anger; Through love alone it ceases.

This, is an eternal law."

- The Buddha

To me, in this age and time, no one can give a discourse on the above teaching by The Buddha as eloquently as the late Venerable Ajahn Mun.

As such, I would like to share it with all of you.

It's taken from the book, "Venerable Acariya Mun Bhuridatta Thera - A Spiritual Biography", written by the Venerable Acariya Maha Boowa Nanasampanno.

Enjoy! :)

“Conquer anger with lack of anger, remember this. For anyone hoping to achieve victory, this is the most important Dhamma to practice. Consider it well – it is the main source of peace and happiness in the world. Love and kindness – these are an effective deterrence against an evil such as anger. By helping to reduce anger’s power to destroy human and devic societies alike, loving kindness fosters peace and prosperity everywhere. Thus, this loving attitude is a prerequisite for social harmony – one we should all strive to develop. In a world lacking this victory formula, dissatisfaction and unrest will arise at the very least. At the extreme, the world will be consumed by mortal strife. Anger and resentment can never defeat our enemies, for they are evils that succeed only in indiscriminately destroying us and everyone close to us. The more anger is used, the more the world we live in becomes a sea of flames, burning uncontrollably toward total annihilation.

“Anger is actually a type of fire that’s inherent in the nature of this world. Although it has no physical properties, it does succeed in creating havoc in its wake. So anyone desiring a stable, sensible world – a place worth living in – should realize the disastrous harm that the fires of anger and resentment can cause; and refrain from ever using them. Starting a fire like this merely causes oneself and everyone else to suffer. Mutual feelings of affection and loving kindness among all living beings maintain the world in its proper equilibrium. Oppressive forces of unrestrained anger and selfish pride should never be allowed to run rampant, causing a never-ending cycle of destruction.

“With his acute wisdom, the Lord Buddha realized the indisputable harm caused by anger. He saw the value of loving kindness as a gentle force that can spontaneously join all living beings in a sense of mutual harmony and goodwill, for all share a common desire for happiness and a common dislike of pain. For this reason, he taught that love and kindness were powerful means of maintaining peace and security in the world. So long as living beings still have loving kindness in their hearts, there’s every chance that their desire for happiness will be fulfilled. But should their hearts become estranged from thoughts of loving kindness, then even with all the material comforts, their lives will still be devoid of genuine peace and happiness. Angry, hateful people tend to encounter only trouble, feeling resentful and annoyed wherever they go.

“Once we know with certainty that Dhamma is something truly beneficial to us, we can clearly see that a heart full of brutality is like a blazing fire gradually destroying everything in its path. We must then urgently strive to overcome these dangers as best we can.

You may never again get such a good opportunity; so, take advantage of it now and avoid regrets in the future.

The world is in a constant state of change and that changing world is situated right here in the bodies and minds of us all.”

- Venerable Acariya Mun Bhuridatta Thera, A Spiritual Biography by Acariya Maha Boowa Nanasampanno, page 220-221)




http://www.what-buddha-taught.net/Books2/Acariya_Mun_Spiritual_Biography.pdf

"Anger can never dispel anger;

Hate can never dispel hate.

Only love can dispel anger.

Only love can dispel hate."

- The Buddha





"Conquer anger by love, evil by good;

Conquer the miser with generosity, and the liar with Truth."

- The Buddha






"Just as greed, selfishness and stinginess comes as a package,

So does anger, jealousy and sadness."
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"After anger, ill-will and hate,

What follows is sorrow, sadness and pain."

The Four Noble Truths

The Four Noble Truths


I'll not begin with the 1st Noble Truth, "There is Suffering" cos' all of us have suffered enough (haven't we?)

And to still begin with it, all of you would probably scuttle away and not read what I have to say.

So I'll begin with the 3rd Truth instead - There's Happiness! (Yeah!)

And there's a way to get there.

In 'Competition and Consequences' - http://maitre-light.blogspot.com/2007/06/competition-and-consequences.html ",

I mentioned that everyone is telling us we need to compete, move fast, be first etc.

Where does it lead us?

Does it make us happy / happier?

Or does it bring us more stress and suffering? (Oops!)

Better yet, ask yourself, "Am I happy? Truthfully, honestly, really happy?"

Were there times when you flare up, feel sad, miserable, jealous, stressed, anxious etc?

If you do, then you're NOT truthfully, honestly, Real-ly happy.

Obviously, something is wrong somewhere with competition, moving fast, being first etc, isn't it?


In 'If' - http://maitre-light.blogspot.com/2007/08/if.html ",

I also said that people tells us we have to get this, have that, so that we'll be happy.

Honestly, truthfully, after getting those things, are you Real-ly happy?

Or do you have to work so hard, 'climbing the high mountains, crossing the great seas' to get it that you're so tired and exhausted after that to truly enjoy it?

Even if you Are happy,

How long does that happiness last?

Or are you off again striving to get something else?

If you think about it, anything that satisfies our desires is the root for dissatisfaction and suffering later. (1st Noble Truth : There is Suffering)


In 'Competition and Consequences - Part 2 : Consequences' (http://maitre-light.blogspot.com/2007/06/competition-and-consequences-part-2.html) ,

I also mentioned that we already have a huge apple pie in front of us, yet we're not satisfied.

When we look to the right, we see someone with a strawberry pie, and we want it.

Then we look to the left, and we see another person with a blueberry pie, and we want it, too.

We can't even finish or cope with our own apple pie, yet we're coveting after other people's pies. (2nd Noble Truth : The Cause of Suffering)

What happen if we have all 3 pies?

We'll be so stuffed, so full and so bloated.

We'll probably suffer from indigestion after that, and we'll be in a bad mood cos' our stomach hurts, and we can hardly walk or breathe.

Not forgetting the high cholesterol, putting on weight, looking fat and puffed up, the high blood pressure, heart condition, irregular heartbeat, toxicity of the liver, the kidneys etc etc.

Is it suffering yet?

I can go on .........

So how?

So be content, with few wants, accept, let go
(3rd Noble Truth : The Cessation of Suffering - Happiness!)

Be happy and satisfied when we have something, Be happy and content even if we don't have.

That way, morality and virtues will slowly seep into our systems, we change our mindset, our views to one of contentment, peace, and everything else will just flow happily along.
( 4th Noble Truth : The Path to the Cessation of Suffering - The Path to Happiness - The Noble Eightfold Path )

Our hearts will prosper, and when our hearts prosper, our families will prosper, and that's how the nation and the whole world prosper,

Not through or by economics alone.

Simple as that.

Try it!

It's formula tried and tested by me - happy happy me. :)



"If you lack moral virtue, then even if you search for happiness until the day you die, you'll never find it.

Instead, you'll find nothing but suffering and discontent."

- Ajahn Maha Boowa



"If there's prosperity in our hearts, then the world can live in happiness and peace.

But if there's only material prosperity, it (material prosperity) can't give the world any happiness (and peace),

But make the world more hot and troubled than before."

- Ajahn Maha Boowa





"You can look and see that however much material progress and development there is in the world,

The confusion and suffering of humans increase right along with it."

- Ajahn Chah




"Suffering comes from 'having'."

- Ajahn Lee Dhammadharo





"External prosperity, Internal bankruptcy.

External prosperity + Internal bankruptcy = Insanity."




"Wherever you go, as long as you have craving,

You'll always have the itch - Suffering!"

- The Buddha



"Contrary to popular conventional and humanistic beliefs,

Prosperity is NOT about and does NOT mean external wealth or worldly possessions;

Prosperity is about inner virtues and morality."




"All who follow their greed, no matter where it leads, are left unsatisfied.

Pleasures always come to an end.

If you allow them to feed your greed,

You'll always be left exhausted and discontented."

Maitreya 3 - Is It Important?

Maitreya 3 - Is It Important?


There was once after a discourse, a man stood up in front of the assemblage, and asked Maitreya,

"They say Buddhas have supernatural powers. Do you have supernatural powers?"

Maitreya looked at the man and said, "Sir, is it important? What good is there in asking that question? Does it make you a better person? Does it help you to be enlighten?"

Stunned, the man stumbled, "Er ......... no"

"Good!", said Maitreya, "then there's no point in answering that question. Go away!"

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"Know what is important. Enlightenment." .
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"We're not here to make money, or to make babies,

Or to make enemies, or to eat and drink.

We're here to help, to serve and to make our lives beneficial for ourselves and all sentient beings.

So do something meaningful today. Everyday."

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"It is more important to know what is important to know,

and NOT what is unimportant."

"Meditation is to, and for letting go.

Physically, we are already acquiring.

If spiritually we still want to acquire,

Then we'll never find peace, never find freedom,

And we'll NEVER be enlighten."

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"Why levitate the body (physical) when you can levitate the mind (spiritual).

For levitation of the mind is by far the greater of the two."

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"Known are the things to be known,

Cultivated are the things to be cultivated,

Destroyed are the things to be destroyed,

Therefore, Brahman, I AM The Buddha."

- The Buddha