(1) I have a student who had some family issues and was quite frustrated about it. I told my student to avoid controlling things, to let go.
My student's reply was, "Oh! I let go. I'm not the one controlling things. They (the family) are.
They want things to be done this way, that way. They're the ones who are holding on, not me. I only want things to be settled fast, but the way my family is handling it, it doesn't seem that way. That's what makes it so frustrating!"
Turning to my student, I said, "By wanting things to be settled fast, that by itself is controlling. If you truly let go, you wouldn't be feeling upset or frustrated now."
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(2) There's a story a monastic told about Thai fishermen : He mentioned that when he was in Thailand, he asked the Thai fishermen aren't they killing fish?
The Thai fisherman's reply was, "Oh no no no ..... Thai fishermen no kill fish. We merely take the fish out of the water and the fish die themselves!"
When I heard that, I thought it's similar as :
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(3) You knocked into, or scratched somebody's car. When the other driver confront you
You tell the driver, "Oh no no no ..... not me. I didn't do anything ..... I merely drive the car alongside / behind of yours and the cars knocked themselves!"
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(4) Or, you spent three-quarter of your husband's monthly salary buying clothes despite your already exploding wardrobe.
When your husband asked you about it, you said, "No, not me. I didn't buy anything. The sales person sold them to me!"
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(5) You were cheated in a get-rich-quick scam.
When questioned by family and friends, you said, "No .... I'm not greedy. I'm also not foolish. I'm just too trusting!".
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"Man's mind is given to so much self-deceit and conceit that he does not want to admit his own weaknesses.
He will try to find some excuse to justify his action and to create an illusion that he is blameless.
If a man really wants to be free, he must have the courage and humility to admit his own weaknesses."
- Venerable Dr K Sri Dhammananda
"Easily seen are others' fault,
Hard to see are our own."
- The Buddha
"The uncultured man always blames other;
The semi-cultured man blames himself.
And, the fully cultured man blames neither."
- The Buddha
"A fool who realise he is a fool is wise at least to that extent;
A fool who thinks himself wise is a fool indeed."
- The Buddha
"He who commits a crime and does not think or feel he has committed a crime,
Is to that extent a criminal indeed."
"Be Responsible.
Take ownership.
STOP 'playing Tai-Chi'."
"So long as an evil deed does not affect the fool,
He thinks it is honey;
But when it affects him,
Then he comes to grief."
- The Buddha
"One should follow a wise man who admonishes one for one's fault,
As one would follow a guide to some buried treasure.
To one who follows such a wise man,
It will be an advantage, and not a disadvantage."
- The Buddha
